Besides your own wedding dress the next most important piece of clothing you will decide on are the bridesmaids dresses. As #Black Southern Belles we are known for doing the most when it comes to dresses. I have seen it all, ugly bows in the back, crazy flowers on the shoulder, outrageous patterns, you name it, a #Black Southern Belle will find it and put it on their bridesmaids.
But I am here to say, it MUST stop. I know you are the bride and it is your day but these dresses will be in your pictures!!! Please don’t have your friends out here looking crazy. Here are are some tips to help you get the look you want for your wedding while also not violating your bridesmaids or losing friends:
1) Get what you want but not everything: You have every right to pick the color, fabric and the designer. These dresses should certainly go with the theme and style of your wedding but also be conscious of skin tones pick a color that goes well with all of your
bridesmaids. If your colors are navy blue and yellow. Choose navy blue. Yellow is not flattering on your bridesmaids. You may be in the delusional bride mode and can’t see it, but when your friends look like canaries in your pictures you will wish you had just chosen the neutral.
2) Ask for a price range: For all you BSBs it is great that your parents want to let you fulfill all of your HBCU Princess dreams but that is not the case for your bridesmaids. So if you are not paying for them be budget conscious. As them them a range they are willing to spend and find options in that range. Trust me they don’t want a $400 kate spade dress to wear for your wedding…..
3) Pay attention to body types: If you have bridesmaids that are all about the same height, size and body shape, you are lucky. But most people are not so lucky, all of your bridesmaids are beautiful in different ways so let them highlight that. It is OK to let them pick the style of dress after you pick the colors, designer and fabric. It won’t kill you but what will kill you is if you pick a dress because you love it and one bridesmaid is falling out of her dress in your pictures or tripping over herself as she walks down the aisle. Just let them choose. They will love you for it.
4) Give them enough time to order: Please, please, please give your bridesmaids time to order your dresses. It will keep you and them sane. Whatever timeframe you think they need add four weeks because something always comes up. Especially with Black Southern Belle Weddings. These dresses are not made to fit Black Southern Belles so there will be alterations, shipping will get delayed, just make sure you build in that “keep your sanity” buffer time.
5) You don’t have to follow tradition: If you don’t care what your bridesmaids wear or you want them to buy something from Ann Taylor versus a traditional bridal store, DO IT! It is your day and your maids will likely kiss the ground you walk on. There are sooo many ways to have coordinated dresses for a wedding and your bridesmaids don’t have to be identical to have a chic Black Southern Wedding.
Lesson of the day is your bridesmaids hold you down and you should do the same accordingly. These are the same girls who threw shade at your fiance’s ex girlfriend and took care of you when you had too much at the first homecoming you realized you were too old to to drink all day and go out all night, so treat them right. And remember Karma is real, you may be getting married now but one day you will be their bridesmaid and you can only hope they are as nice to you as you are to them!
XOXO
Michiel
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